The BCM Buzz

Spiritual But Not Religious

2010-06-04T10:36:00.002-04:00

Hey guys it's been awhile since anyone's posted on this, but I have this random article that DWhite found and I thought it was really interesting and worthy of sharing. Here it is:

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/personal/06/03/spiritual.but.not.religious/index.html?hpt=C2

So the article talks about the growing trend of people being "spiritual but not religious". What are everyone's thoughts on this? I'm really afraid of this because of my recent experiences with depression. How do you counteract depressive thoughts without the support and strength of God? I'm afraid what would have happened to me if I had not had Christ's strength protecting me from myself in the past few years, providing me with hope for the future and a reason for life. If anyone wants to discuss this with me in more detail please feel free to, I am more than happy to discuss my experiences or anyone else's similar experiences. I am not ashamed to say I have struggled with depression and still am at some points. I am not ashamed to say that God has pulled me through depression and has saved me from my at times self destructive thoughts or tendencies. I am incredibly thankful that God has stayed with me through all of this, and I can't imagine trying to live without Him near me. Please if anyone wants to talk this over or even if anyone just has any thoughts about faith or spirituality and wants to bounce them off of me or just share their opinions please let me know. My life has been dramatically changed because of God's persistence in pursuing me and it would be selfish of me to keep this to myself and not allow everyone the opportunity of experiencing this same thing. I hope everyone is having a great summer, and I can't wait to get back to Tech and hear how everyone's summers went. I miss and love you all. - Beaz

People Matter

2009-04-27T12:39:00.000-04:00

remember this?

http://www.vimeo.com/2050660

Finals Week Spring '09 - People Matter

Negative or Positive

2009-04-01T21:01:00.002-04:00

So I feel the need to express this and I hope that people take it the right way...but I feel like much of the BCM has a very negative atmosphere to it. Sarcasm is fun and hilarious at times, but I feel like at times our BCM has fallen victim to sarcasm going too far. Recently a friend from outside the BCM sarcastically stated "wow...i can tell the BCM is quite the uplifting place" after witnessing interaction between two BCM members. I know she was joking, but still...what are we saying to nonchristians through our negative interactions with each other? Why would anyone ever want to become involved in a place that is known for tearing each other down and constantly using other people as a source of amusement. I'm not saying I'm fault-free here...quite the opposite actually...but I think it's definitely something we all need to think about. I know I have become more and more sarcastic as the year has gone on and I'm worried about what has resulted from that. I think it's important to remember that what we say and what we do directly affects everyone around us and can even cause other people to turn away from Christ or the BCM or even to cause other people to deal with the temptation to sin. As a female, I have been reminded that what I wear and how I act not only affects my life, but can cause other people to sin. If a female is not dressed appropriately when around males, she can become a source of temptation - and I feel like not acknowledging this and being careful of this is incredibly selfish. With this said, the same goes for our words and actions. Through what we say, we can cause another person to be tempted to lash out in anger or become frustrated and even turn from God by sinning. The only truly selfless thing to do is to make sure we watch what we say so we don't become a temptation towards hate or bitterness for other people. Maybe the BCM is actually a very positive place and this was just one not so wonderful example of a negative interaction, but I guess I kinda feel like it might be more than that. Maybe I'm wrong, but if nothing else...it's something to think about. Through our actions and words, are we building the self-centered hypocritical christian stereotype or tearing it down? I feel my guilt. Let's change.

social christianity

2009-03-27T19:26:00.004-04:00

here's a question to throw out to anyone who reads this...do you have to enjoy being around people in order to be a christian? does feeling like being around people is a huge effort and huge sacrifice make you less of a person? if you purposely avoid people so you don't have to go through the agony of making small talk and having to deal with their problems along with your own, does that make you incapable of following God's plan for your life? Would God ever make someone incapable of normal human action as part of His great plan? Why does christianity always seem to only be for those who are social and outgoing? How can someone glorify God if they are constantly alone? Is it possible that God planned it that way? Is there ever a time when someone putting other people before themselves can look like that person taking alone time?

maybe? or totally ridiculous...

Jesus is not a wimp.

2009-03-20T23:14:00.005-04:00

there's a lot to be said for beach reach this past week...but i'm too tired to accurately portray how amazing the experience was for me

but just to start you off...as a little teaser i guess...here are some points that really hit home with me this past week (i won't even try to start in on all that we actually experienced and learned and discovered and all the people we met....it's too huge and it deserves its own post...these are just some things that really hit me during the worship time...thought i'd share)

"You are not without direction if you are without answers." -- I / we question God constantly...just because we don't get straight forward answers in our minds doesn't mean He's not guiding us.

"When you wake up in the morning, you are responsible for glorifying God and proclaiming His glory." -- when was the last time that was the first thing you thought of when you woke up...or the biggest priority you had throughout the day? yeah, me too

The speaker stated that when he made a commitment for Christ, he didn't think about eternity. What drew him to the gospel was that day in and day out his life could have purpose, hope,...
--crazy - and personally i think that's true for a lot of people

He also said something along the lines of that the creativity of some people is even unimaginable for us (his example was Disney and all the creativity involved in all things Disney), so why is it so strange for God to have unfathomable greatness? Why is it so strange for us to not understand why God does what He does or to not fully understand all He is?

Worship was so filled with joy - everyone seemed so incredibly pumped up to be in a room worshiping God and experiencing His crazy awesomeness...do you think sometimes we lose that perspective at the BCM? When was the last time you were so excited about what God was doing in your life and just so excited to be worshiping God that you couldn't help but jump up and down or shout for joy? Why aren't we more "crazed" for God? Why do we settle for small amounts of Him each day -- we should never have enough of Him...right?

How cool would it be if even half the people who regularly attended some sort of BCM event would say (and truly mean this) to God: "God, I will do somehting different. I will enact Your change." -- what if instead of trying to plan our own change, we really followed what He had planned -- talk about the easy way out...all we have to do is listen and act out the change He already has planned...but crap...those listening and acting parts are what get us every time

Let's never say through our actions, "That's too much Jesus for me." Let's never settle for a small Jesus...afterall...."Jesus is not a wimp."

I wish I could accurately portray all of that better for everyone who wasn't in panama city with us. The real amazingness was in the relationships formed and practiced...maybe another night i'll tackle expressing those

thanks so much for all of the prayer - God heard and God moved in crazy ways

Covering Fire

2009-03-16T21:30:00.004-04:00

Spring break has come at last! We now sit in the middle of a time of rest which we have no doubt waited a long time for. We as a BCM have scattered to the four winds it seems.

I am very fond of the spring break trips we as a campus ministry continue to organize every year. My freshman year, I spent my first real mission trip with the then BSU in Bay St. Lous. I was challenged in ways I hadn't yet dreamed of and built some strong friendships that continue to this day. Last year also I spent spring break with the BCM in the Road Trip group where we served and fellowshipped both locally and abroad. The appalachian trail was particularly inspiring.

This year, three groups of people in particular come to mind. We have sent out three spring break groups:

Beach Reach in Panama City
Asheville
Numbered which is traveling all over the place

And now as we are scatted, I feel, it is time to broach the subject of prayer.

Perhaps you are like me in that you have had difficulty in committing to pray for people. I know there have been more than one occasion in my life when, emotionally stirred by a sermon or message, I made some committment to pray for missionaries over seas or a divine work in foreign lands. Of course, these commitments have often fallen flat.

But that isn't time to kick ourselves for forgetting to pray in the past.

It is these poignant times that I often think of prayer as a sort of "covering fire" we can give to our brothers and sisters. Not everyone may make the charge into enemy territory or at least, not in the same place. There comes a time to support our fellows from a distance. Though we may not be able to stand side by side with each other this week, we can pray for each other, whether we are serving on the beach, travelling from Tennessee to Alabama, or merely spending time away from being busy.

I don't ask for a commitment to pray every day or a promise that may or may not be kept. I only ask that you pray. Go ahead and do it now (why wait?). Pray that God will do a mighty work, keep his people safe, and grow us all this week. If you've got time, spend some time in quiet. If you don't, just pray as you go. Pray again as you remember.

I look forward to hearing the stories when we return. But don't think that the time to pray for each other belongs only to one week in the spring when school is off. Maybe, just maybe, we can keep up the covering fire when the spring break has long passed.

survival instincts

2009-03-12T01:43:00.002-04:00

Why are you a christian? and not the church answer...not the answer that you feel you should say...but seriously...what first motivated you to want to put someone else in charge of your life...why the heck would you ever want to put all of your trust in someone / some thing you can't even see or touch or sometimes even feel...what's in that for you?...why have we done it? why are we christians?

my answer is selfish...i became a christian for completely selfish reasons...because i had to...because if i hadn't accepted christ...if i hadn't given my life over to someone else...anyone else besides me...i wouldn't make it day to day, month to month, year to year without crashing and maybe not making it back out of the hole...my motivation was a survival instinct somewhere deep inside of me that drew me towards the one thing - one person - that could save me from destruction...and what an awesome instinct that turned out to be

do you ever wonder if everyone else feels that same instinct...but instead of turning to an awesome savior they turn to literally anyone else...a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a parent, a friend, an enemy, a drug, an activity, anything...so what makes me any different from someone who felt the same things, but was just drawn to something different? why do i have God to control my life and they have fallible humanity to lead theirs...what makes me any different? i'm not any more deserving...less so almost...was it the people around me gently guiding me there? did they give me God as an option if nothing else, so at least i could consider Him as 'one of the worthy keepers' of my life?...

what's your answer? why did you do it? why'd you first take the plunge?

"the other side"

2009-03-08T14:39:00.004-04:00

So I've been reading The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand lately and well it's a messed up book in a way haha but I love it. I love the way she writes and the way she pulls things out of the world that I never would have been able to pull out or express that way. Anyway, recently I came across a a section that really hit home for me and I thought I might share it. Here's a really crappy catch-you-up for anyone who hasn't read the book (anyone who has...feel free to correct me if my summary is wrong)

This guy, Mallory, meets one of the main characters, Roark,and basically Roark refuses to accept society and refuses to accept that he must be a cookie cutter mold and refuses to stab other people in the back but insists that his own individualism and own individual creativity in architecture is far superior to any of the crap architecture that the other "sellouts" are giving the public, because the other guys are just giving society what they want...not what is actually great, ingenious architecture...for example, Roark works within simplicity...everything is created for a purpose and serves that purpose while being beautiful as a result almost...not stupid ornaments everywhere to make a building seem more expensive...not architectural ideas stolen from everyone else....anyway...haha Mallory is similar in his creative genius but with sculpture instead of architecture...and so Roark asks Mallory to make a sculpture for a temple that Roark has been hired to design and build...and when Roark finds Mallory, Mallory is basically going crazy in his apartment - he hasn't had work in forever and has basically suffered because no one wants him...nothing he does is considered amazing...although Roark thinks it is...Mallory has become an outcast, as has Roark, but Mallory is younger and weaker than Roark and he goes almost insane and can't handle not sculpting and can't handle seeing all the crap around him that is created with no personal investment in the project, just the goal of making money and getting rich, etc....

So with that in mind, I came across this part where Roark addresses Mallory saying:

“Now,” he said, “talk. Talk about the things you really want said. Don’t tell me about your family, your childhood, your friends or your feelings. Tell me about the things you think.”
Mallory looked at him incredulously and whispered:
“How did you know that?”
Roark smiled and said nothing.
“How did you know what’s been killing me? Slowly, for years, driving me to hate people when I don’t want to hate….Have you felt it, too? Have you seen how your best friends love everything about you-except the things that count? And your most important is nothing to them, nothing, not even a sound they can recognize. You mean, you want to hear? You want to know what I do and why I do it, you want to know what I think? It’s not boring to you? It’s important?”

I think I can really relate to the way Mallory feels in this...recently I have hated everyone around me for no reason...and it's been horrible and I hate that I hate so much...and there's no reason for it...but I've been trying to pull myself out of it...is this a normal feeling? Do other people feel this way sometimes? I'm not sure there's a solution to it even...maybe I'm a Mallory who needs to find a Roark haha...or maybe everyone feels this way at times but no one will admit it because we feel like we have to be happy 24/7 to show people that christians are always happy and never hurt. NOT TRUE...why do I feel like this is such a goal in today's Christian society? Am I alone in this thought?

Later Mallory goes on to talk about Roark and how Roark found him utterly destroyed and torn down. Mallory says,
"I'm wiser than you are about some things, because I'm weaker. I understand-the other side. That’s what did it to me … what you saw yesterday.”

I think this is huge...I can't speak for everyone else but I know that I know what it feels like to be completely down and feel like there is literally no hope...Christians arent supposed to feel that way...they're always supposed to have hope in God...and I do...but sometimes I dont...is that ok? In a way does it make me stronger? Do other people share in this or am I unique?...and I guess I feel like as a new christian I know what it feels like too to live in the nonchristian world and in one way that makes me weaker sorta - I dont have all these experiences with God for all these years...but in another way it makes me stronger...makes me understand what happens to everyone to an extent and makes me realize how horrible it is and how much we all need God...makes me realize that God caring even a little bit is amazing...and that even if we're dealing with crap while trusting God...it's 10 times better than dealing with crap without God. When people are too strong do they become weaker in a way cause they can't understand what it feels like to hurt?...or they can't understand the weaker people?...or they get too confident?...or get too self sufficient or something? I think so sometimes. ...in a way I relate to being the weaker, "wiser" one...and on the other hand I relate to being the stronger, "less wise" one...I think maybe we all do...Why do we feel the need to hide this pain and all these trials from our friends, from ourselves, or even try to hide it from God...Life isn't all smiles and giggles...but doesn't that make life just that much more amazing and unpredictable and fullfilling? Am I totally off on this? I might be...but at the same time I might not...

The book of Job wasn't included in the Bible for nothing right? Should we yearn to understand "the other side"?

ps - it's gorgeous outside! times might not always be easy...and God might not always make life any easier and God won't always "make everything better" - in fact I sorta feel like that rarely happens...how would we grow otherwise? - ...but days like these make me smile :-)

Freshmen Are Awesome

2009-02-27T10:43:00.004-05:00

So for me, the best part about Advanced was definitely hanging around the Freshmen. I mean, I played foursquare with them until like 2:30 in the morning. It cost me a Michael Ellis shoe to the face in the end, but I got to know Zack Dicky, the Tolers (hope that's right), Riley, and so many others. This weekend I saw a glimpse of their hearts, and what I found was hope and encouragement in the future of our BCM. Specifically, I mean the impact that we can have on the future, the impact that Christ can have through us. I've got one more year, and now I'm thinking to myself, "Let's really pass on the torch." Let's give it to the freshmen, all we can!

And thank you freshmen for leading us. It was definitely a reminder for me in humility. I am trying to lead people, but I am still a follower. In all of us being followers, we can still encourage each other in so many ways. Freshmen you did an amazing job last weekend. I had a blast!

Not For Beginners

2009-02-25T13:30:00.003-05:00

So Advance has come and gone. This is only the second time we've even had a "BCM Advance" and I already feel like its become a tradition.

I hope everyone had as good of a time as I did. I lost a lot of sleep playing card games (Where my Mao players at?) but it was all worth it in the end.

When I think about the word "Advance" I can't help but think of "Advanced." It is, after all, a single consonant away. "Advanced" as in "Expert" or "not for beginners." Our topic this weekend was pretty advanced as far as retreats go. I've been to retreats on worship, on sacrifice, on nothing in particular, on evangelism, on general leadership, and more - but never have I been on a retreat about "Slingshot leadership." But maybe its not so tough after all. Maybe I've just made it too complicated.

It's pretty convenient that we would cover this on my (possibly) last Advance trip with the BCM. It makes me reflect on my three full years I've already had with the BCM and how things have changed. Did you know we were the Baptist Student Union when I first got here? I hope so. If not, then I really feel old.

This whole idea of propelling future leaders further than we can go in the first place has got to be instrumental to the idea of transient college ministry. One of our fundamental problems is that every four (or five) years, the BCM pretty much gets a brand new cast of faces. This has its pros and cons, but regardless, it is a reality. Since we know there will come a time in the near future when we are no longer a face among our peers, we must prepare those that come after us. This manifests itself in a number of ways: encouragement, small group leadership, mentorship, giving others an opportunity to lead, frienship, being a follower first, and more. We have come not only to make a mark on our campus now, but to prepare those that will one day make their own mark. It's a ripple effect, and we may never know the true extent of our actions (till heaven! woo!).

The key is, it's relational. Our ministry here can be fun, friendly, and still powerful. As we sharpen each other, we prepare each other for the rest of our lives.

I hope that the younger people at the BCM who came to the retreat were as encouraged by the weekend as I was. I realize that not all of you may have stepped into "leadership" roles just yet, but I wanted to say that you have our support. I also wanted to remind you that leadership can come without titles. I am continually amazed and encouraged by the enthusiasm, faith, and courage that you pump into our ministry. Your leadership can turn this campus upside down.

That's not to say that we're done here. There is much left to do, and many things left to learn. I look forward to doing so side by side with everyone.

Is Anger Ever Ok?

2009-02-22T00:30:00.002-05:00

Is it ok to get angry with God? Is there ever a time when anger is justifiable and/or considered OK or even good? Is there such a thing as righteous anger? Are all forms of anger OK as long as the correct action is taken to deal with them? Or is it ALWAYS a sin to get angry, especially with God?

Just something I've been dueling with for awhile...I'd love to hear thoughts if anyone wouldn't mind sharing. I've got plenty of thoughts on the topic but I hate to bias people or be biased too much before I hear their thoughts first haha

On a different note...

Advance was amazing.

I am so excited / nervous to pray over and decide where I want to apply for leadership at the BCM and I'm so glad I went on Advance. I hope everyone else is feeling the same way because I think we can really expect awesome things from the BCM the rest of this year and next year. I feel like there's so much potential for each of the vision teams for next year. We've already come so far with them this year that I feel like next year will only be better and better. Thank you to everyone who really put their effort and care into this short weekend, especially the freshmen. I absolutely LOVE freshmen ministry and I LOVE freshmen (in a very non creepy way haha) and I just think that everyone did a great job of stepping up and really showing what kind of young leaders the BCM will have next year. Thank you to all the upperclassmen who prayed over the underclassmen...if nothing else I know that meant a lot to me and really encouraged me to be excited and ready for a leadership opportunity...wherever God leads me. I encourage EVERYONE to look over the leadership application info and really seriously consider where you can get involved or remain involved at the BCM. I can't wait to see where we all are this time next year. Thanks everyone and I hope everyone else's Advance experiences were as awesome as mine. Be in prayer. Constantly. I need to be in prayer WAY more.

Darwin's Birthday

2009-02-12T15:32:00.002-05:00

So I was reading a little bit at the Institute for Creation Research website. If you haven't ever been there, definitely go check it out. It's what one calls real science. So I was reading, and I discovered that the month of February houses Charles Darwin's birthday. Yay, right? Then I discovered that people across the globe are throwing big parties to celebrating Charles Darwin and his theory of evolution. "Hang on", I thought to myself. "Why does Darwin get a big birthday bash? What about Newton or Einstein, or Kepler and Galileo, why don't they get parties?" What's so special about Darwin? I thought some more. And here it is.

These people are celebrating Darwin and the separation of humanity from the oppression of religion, and not just any religion, but Christianity which is the only belief out there that gives any kind justification of where everything came from and why. But don't people know what they are cheering on really? I'll tell you. It's hopelessness. Yay, we're all decendants of monkeys created by random chance. We have no spirit, no eternal purpose, and when we die... well, we don't know. We guess we'll be nothing.

It saddened me to read this. Nihilism is a terrible and hopeless situation. If I could meet one of those guys, I think I would ask them, "Why are you excited that you are worthless and your life is meaningless?" Dear people, do you even know what you are saying? Don't you just want to tell such people about Jesus? Here! Live for something, love for something!

Lord, reveil to these people their folly. Open the eyes of their hearts to Jesus. And give your sons and daughter boldness to speak the truth of your name. Amen.

Welcome Back, Duke by Peggy Noonan

2009-02-11T20:35:00.002-05:00

When I read this I about cried. I felt a spirit rise up in me that wanted to fight something, something evil. I have seen sissyness in my own life and I'm tired of seeing it. I wanna be like the Duke! It reminds me so much of Wild at Heart. Man, God, kick my rump off that chair and build me into a better man.

Here is Peggy's article---

Welcome Back, Duke
From the ashes of Sept. 11 arise the manly virtues.

Friday, October 12, 2001 12:01 A.M. EDT

A few weeks ago I wrote a column called "God Is Back," about how, within a day of the events of Sept. 11, my city was awash in religious imagery--prayer cards, statues of saints. It all culminated, in a way, in the discovery of the steel-girder cross that emerged last week from the wreckage--unbent, unbroken, unmelted, perfectly proportioned and duly blessed by a Catholic friar on the request of the rescue workers, who seemed to see meaning in the cross's existence. So do I.

My son, a teenager, finds this hilarious, as does one of my best friends. They have teased me, to my delight, but I have told them, "Boys, this whole story is about good and evil, about the clash of good and evil." If you are of a certain cast of mind, it is of course meaningful that the face of the Evil One seemed to emerge with a roar from the furnace that was Tower One. You have seen the Associated Press photo, and the photos that followed: the evil face roared out of the building with an ugly howl--and then in a snap of the fingers it lost form and force and disappeared. If you are of a certain cast of mind it is of course meaningful that the cross, which to those of its faith is imperishable, did not disappear. It was not crushed by the millions of tons of concrete that crashed down upon it, did not melt in the furnace. It rose from the rubble, still there, intact.

For the ignorant, the superstitious and me (and maybe you), the face of the Evil One was revealed, and died; for the ignorant, the superstitious and me (and maybe you), the cross survived. This is how God speaks to us. He is saying, "I am." He is saying, "I am here." He is saying, "And the force of all the evil of all the world will not bury me."

I believe this quite literally. But then I am experiencing Sept. 11 not as a political event but as a spiritual event.

And, of course, a cultural one, which gets me to my topic.

It is not only that God is back, but that men are back. A certain style of manliness is once again being honored and celebrated in our country since Sept. 11. You might say it suddenly emerged from the rubble of the past quarter century, and emerged when a certain kind of man came forth to get our great country out of the fix it was in.

I am speaking of masculine men, men who push things and pull things and haul things and build things, men who charge up the stairs in a hundred pounds of gear and tell everyone else where to go to be safe. Men who are welders, who do construction, men who are cops and firemen. They are all of them, one way or another, the men who put the fire out, the men who are digging the rubble out, and the men who will build whatever takes its place.

And their style is back in style. We are experiencing a new respect for their old-fashioned masculinity, a new respect for physical courage, for strength and for the willingness to use both for the good of others.

You didn't have to be a fireman to be one of the manly men of Sept. 11. Those businessmen on flight 93, which was supposed to hit Washington, the businessmen who didn't live by their hands or their backs but who found out what was happening to their country, said goodbye to the people they loved, snapped the cell phone shut and said, "Let's roll." Those were tough men, the ones who forced that plane down in Pennsylvania. They were tough, brave guys.

Let me tell you when I first realized what I'm saying. On Friday, Sept. 14, I went with friends down to the staging area on the West Side Highway where all the trucks filled with guys coming off a 12-hour shift at ground zero would pass by. They were tough, rough men, the grunts of the city--construction workers and electrical workers and cops and emergency medical worker and firemen.

I joined a group that was just standing there as the truck convoys went by. And all we did was cheer. We all wanted to do some kind of volunteer work but there was nothing left to do, so we stood and cheered those who were doing. The trucks would go by and we'd cheer and wave and shout "God bless you!" and "We love you!" We waved flags and signs, clapped and threw kisses, and we meant it: We loved these men. And as the workers would go by--they would wave to us from their trucks and buses, and smile and nod--I realized that a lot of them were men who hadn't been applauded since the day they danced to their song with their bride at the wedding.

And suddenly I looked around me at all of us who were cheering. And saw who we were. Investment bankers! Orthodontists! Magazine editors! In my group, a lawyer, a columnist and a writer. We had been the kings and queens of the city, respected professional in a city that respects its professional class. And this night we were nobody. We were so useless, all we could do was applaud the somebodies, the workers who, unlike us, had not been applauded much in their lives.

And now they were saving our city.

I turned to my friend and said, "I have seen the grunts of New York become kings and queens of the City." I was so moved and, oddly I guess, grateful. Because they'd always been the people who ran the place, who kept it going, they'd just never been given their due. But now--"And the last shall be first"--we were making up for it.

It may seem that I am really talking about class--the professional classes have a new appreciation for the working class men of Lodi, N.J., or Astoria, Queens. But what I'm attempting to talk about is actual manliness, which often seems tied up with class issues, as they say, but isn't always by any means the same thing.

Here's what I'm trying to say: Once about 10 years ago there was a story--you might have read it in your local tabloid, or a supermarket tabloid like the National Enquirer--about an American man and woman who were on their honeymoon in Australia or New Zealand. They were swimming in the ocean, the water chest-high. From nowhere came a shark. The shark went straight for the woman, opened its jaws. Do you know what the man did? He punched the shark in the head. He punched it and punched it again. He did not do brilliant commentary on the shark, he did not share his sensitive feelings about the shark, he did not make wry observations about the shark, he punched the shark in the head. So the shark let go of his wife and went straight for him. And it killed him. The wife survived to tell the story of what her husband had done. He had tried to deck the shark. I told my friends: That's what a wonderful man is, a man who will try to deck the shark.

I don't know what the guy did for a living, but he had a very old-fashioned sense of what it is to be a man, and I think that sense is coming back into style because of who saved us on Sept. 11, and that is very good for our country.

Why? Well, manliness wins wars. Strength and guts plus brains and spirit wins wars. But also, you know what follows manliness? The gentleman. The return of manliness will bring a return of gentlemanliness, for a simple reason: masculine men are almost by definition gentlemen. Example: If you're a woman and you go to a faculty meeting at an Ivy League University you'll have to fight with a male intellectual for a chair, but I assure you that if you go to a Knights of Columbus Hall, the men inside (cops, firemen, insurance agents) will rise to offer you a seat. Because they are manly men, and gentlemen.

It is hard to be a man. I am certain of it; to be a man in this world is not easy. I know you are thinking, But it's not easy to be a woman, and you are so right. But women get to complain and make others feel bad about their plight. Men have to suck it up. Good men suck it up and remain good-natured, constructive and helpful; less-good men become the kind of men who are spoofed on "The Man Show"--babe-watching, dope-smoking nihilists. (Nihilism is not manly, it is the last refuge of sissies.)

I should discuss how manliness and its brother, gentlemanliness, went out of style. I know, because I was there. In fact, I may have done it. I remember exactly when: It was in the mid-'70s, and I was in my mid-20s, and a big, nice, middle-aged man got up from his seat to help me haul a big piece of luggage into the overhead luggage space on a plane. I was a feminist, and knew our rules and rants. "I can do it myself," I snapped.

It was important that he know women are strong. It was even more important, it turns out, that I know I was a jackass, but I didn't. I embarrassed a nice man who was attempting to help a lady. I wasn't lady enough to let him. I bet he never offered to help a lady again. I bet he became an intellectual, or a writer, and not a good man like a fireman or a businessman who says, "Let's roll."

But perhaps it wasn't just me. I was there in America, as a child, when John Wayne was a hero, and a symbol of American manliness. He was strong, and silent. And I was there in America when they killed John Wayne by a thousand cuts. A lot of people killed him--not only feminists but peaceniks, leftists, intellectuals, others. You could even say it was Woody Allen who did it, through laughter and an endearing admission of his own nervousness and fear. He made nervousness and fearfulness the admired style. He made not being able to deck the shark, but doing the funniest commentary on not decking the shark, seem . . . cool.

But when we killed John Wayne, you know who we were left with. We were left with John Wayne's friendly-antagonist sidekick in the old John Ford movies, Barry Fitzgerald. The small, nervous, gossiping neighborhood commentator Barry Fitzgerald, who wanted to talk about everything and do nothing.

This was not progress. It was not improvement.

I missed John Wayne.

But now I think . . . he's back. I think he returned on Sept. 11. I think he ran up the stairs, threw the kid over his back like a sack of potatoes, came back down and shoveled rubble. I think he's in Afghanistan now, saying, with his slow swagger and simmering silence, "Yer in a whole lotta trouble now, Osama-boy."

I think he's back in style. And none too soon.

Welcome back, Duke.

And once again: Thank you, men of Sept. 11.

Ms. Noonan is a contributing editor of The Wall Street Journal. Her new book, "When Character Was King: A Story of Ronald Reagan," will be published by Viking Penguin this fall. Her column appears Fridays.

2009-02-11T14:43:00.001-05:00

Hey, guys. I just got on the blog. I wonder how many BCM people are actually viewing it? By the way, who is Beaz?

I "love" You, God

2009-02-05T15:30:00.004-05:00

So this week at Connector, Larry Grays (Pastor at Midtown-Bridge Church) spoke. I thought he really hit some good points and really made me think about a lot of things. He mentioned at one point that a lot of people seem to focus on the phrase, "I love You, God." He pointed out that too much of our worship is focused on us - puts us in the subject. He said that God needs to be the subject of our worship at all times. This was big for me I think, because for a long time I've been struggling with the idea of becoming less of a "me-based christian". Everything I find myself talking to God about is me, my plans, my life, my comfort, my joy. How do I break this trend? My first response in reducing the me-ness of my prayer is to want to treat God like I would any other friend and to be like "Hey, God...what's up in Your life right now...what are you struggling with?" but then I realize that that is not at all going to work. God isn't just another friend that I should support or be there for...He is so much more than that and I don't give Him the credit of being so much more very often. "I love You, God"....do I really? What do I mean when I tell God I love Him? Sure, I love Him in that moment, but will I love Him 10 minutes later when things aren't going my way?
"Does Job fear God for nothing?' Satan replied. 'Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. But stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face." - Job 1:9-11
Satan is right as his comment applies to my life, as much as I hate to admit it. I "love" God whenever things are going well for me and when it's easy to "love" Him, but what do I do when I feel down or tired or selfish or discouraged? I curse His name. I get angry with Him and sometimes I even feel hatred towards Him. I turn away from Him and instead of turning to Him for comfort and realizing that He is the one who can get me out of this, I hide inside myself and my pride and my stubbornness and refuse to accept His help. I prefer to wallow in my "horrible life" instead of being strong enough to realize that God is never "at blame", but rather is the creator and controller of all. I have no right to EVER place "blame" on God. I don't have a right to even tell Him I "love" Him. I don't even really know what love is or what that incredibly powerful word is and I think I use it way too much. I think I'm going to try not to tell God I love Him until I really mean it...even if that never happens due to my horrible human fallibility. I hate the word love. It's digressed to such a meaningless term that is thrown around like it's nothing. I don't want to "love" God the way "love" is used today. I want to love God the way He loves me. But I can't do that unless He allows me to love Him that way. I'm confused...I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere...I don't feel like I have a close connection to God...I don't understand who God is - like really understand who He is. Should I look out for myself more? Should I not be a pushover anymore? or should I be less selfish and give more and more of myself to everyone around me? But how much can I give before I break? Why is it always about me? What does it really mean for God to love us? I'm tired of my relationship with God being all about ME and God...but what else can it be? Me and my small group and God? Me and my friends and God? Everyone and God? What about just God? How can God's relationship with me be only about Him? How does that happen? Where do I go next? Who am I supposed to be? Who does God want me to be? What does God want me to do? How does God see me? How does God view Himself? Do I really truly believe in God and have faith in Him? No, not completely. Is it possible to have complete, never wavering faith in God? God is too big and too crazy awesome for me to understand...why is He like that? Why would He make us incapable of understand how big He is...I guess I sorta feel like it would make more sense for Him to make us capable of understand who He is and how huge He is, just not be able to achieve anything even remotely close to Him. Why are we so incapable of understanding? Why did God create man? He doesn't need us. He doesn't need anyone / anything. Why? Why do we spend so much time in school and then most of us never use what we learned in school...why do we even care? Larry said something to the effect of that the only reason Jesus hasn't come back for judgement yet is because God is passionate about seeing lost people repent and give their lives to Him. Then why aren't we evangelizing our little butts off to we can quick get everyone to give their lives to God so that we can get to be with God as quickly as possible. Why do we waste our time with school and sports and life in general? What does it look like to give your life over to evangelizing? Why do I hate who I am? Why do I care who I am or what I think about myself. GOD is everything. What God thinks of me - that's what matters. What does God think of me? What does God think of this? Is it ok to be confident and proud of yourself sometimes? Too much...too much to think about...too few answers...too few people who care...life isn't about you, it isn't about me, so get out of your stupid freaking hole of me-based christianity and live for GOD...when you figure out how let me know...i might be interested in trying too

Valentines day should be a day celebrating God...just like every other day...celebrating that God loves us...whatever the heck that means...not the commercialized forced "love" holiday it's become...I hate the very idea of earthly "love"

Dear God,
I love...errr I mean...God...I have nothing to say...nothing is truthful or even close to what is truth...I have nothing to say to you except....God...now how am I supposed to pray?

Ski Trip!

2009-01-28T10:15:00.002-05:00

So this is the first time I have ever written on here...I completely failed last semester. Sorry about that!

Anyway, I'm here to talk about the goings on at the BCM, most recently the International Ski Trip. For those who don't know, the BCM has an International Student ministry that meets every Wednesday to help them learn English. They also go on trips around Atlanta and, in this case, North Carolina. I personally have never been involved in the Int'l Ministry before, but I have always wanted to give it a try and decided this would be a perfect opportunity--I had never been skiing before and wanted to get out of Atlanta for a while.

We met at the BCM on Friday and carpooled up to NC. Just while we were waiting for everyone to arrive, I got to know several of the Int'l girls by playing Taboo and 2 of them ended up riding in my car (Schweta and Ritu). Eventually we left and made the 4-hour drive up there. It was a bit of a challenge finding places to eat since about half of the Int'l students are vegetarian, so we ended up at Pizza Hut (high quality). By the time we got to the church we were supposed to meet at, it was already somewhat late, but they had a whole program planned out for us (this wasn't just a GT event, all of the Georgia BCMs came with their Int'l kids, so there were a lot of people). This program included a comedian (which half of us missed, but apparently he made fun of UGA a lot, so he was obviously good in our books) and.....wait for it...line dancing! Apparently it's "something we here in the South like to do all the time"....yeah...well, there are some pretty entertaining pictures on facebook if you want to check those out. Some of us caught on more quickly than others...but we all had a good time.

Saturday morning we had to get up at 6 am (booooo) to eat breakfast and then leave by 7 for the ski place. That morning, there happened to be a lot of fog/cloud/something opaque, and we had to drive up the side of the mountain for about 20 minutes with almost no idea what was in front of us. And I was in the front of all the cars. Wonderful....but we made it up there alive, obviously. When we left, we saw how high up we were, and let's just say I'm glad I didn't make any mistakes. Haha. We all went and got ski equipment, and most of us went to ski school for about an hour. I had an awesome instructor from New Zealand, and after the lesson and a few runs down the bunny slope I felt ready to go on the beginner's slope. I pretty much stuck to that all day along with most of the other Tech kids. A few people went on the intermediate, and I probably could have by the end of the day, but decided it could wait until next year. I actually never fell while I was on the slope, it was just when I was standing around waiting to start skiing, or when I had just stopped, that I tipped over. Hahaha....graceful=not Lindsay.

After we stopped to take a group picture, we packed the cars and headed back to Atlanta. All in all it was a great trip, and I had so much fun with the Int'l kids. They were very friendly, easy to talk to, and grateful to us for taking them. I would highly encourage you all to get involved with this ministry. Even if you can't go to Conversation Club every Wednesday night, at least go on their trips. You won't regret it.

New Pages to the Digital Scrapbook

2009-01-13T17:05:00.003-05:00

Chia Yearbook

2009-01-12T02:23:00.002-05:00

I have never felt as completely reliant on God as I do now. I have never felt so horribly vulnerable and terrified. It feels horrible and unbearable, yet amazing at the same time and my tiny little brain can't comprehend how it's possible. I can't say that I frequently want to go through what I'm going through now in order to be closer to God...but I feel like God is growing me so much. It's like in the princess bride when they put him in that stretching machine. I feel like life has me by both wrists (yes i know...wrists...) and both ankles and refuses to let go. But I'm growing. Growing sucks. Growing hurts. Growing is just an overall poopy experience. But I'm growing. I'm giving it to God. Or at least I'm giving a little tiny bit to God every day. As much as I'm capable of giving that day. And one day He'll have the whole thing...even if that's not till the last second before I die...at least He'll have it. He'll have me and everything I stand for and everything I am and everything I think is so incredibly important now but as it turns out, won't even matter in a year or two or 20. I'm giving it to Him. I don't even know what that means, but I'm doing it. Or at least I think I am. I want to. I need to. I don't feel purposefull right now. But I'm growing. I have boughts of depression for stupid reasons if any reason at all. But I'm growing. I asked God a couple months ago to allow me to REALLY get to know Him. I was terrified what would happen after I prayed that. I semi-expected spouts of lava to shoot up through the floor of my room in some supernatural feat of nature and cause me to cling to the side of North Ave and then as I was about to be skewered to death by the tree below, have an angel fly down and show me a picture of God's high school year book with a cheesy "HAGS" signature by me and my so inconsistent friendship and laugh at the irony of me seeing God's "face" only moments before I would see His face for all of eternity. That's not dramatic at all. The point is that I had no idea what the heck He was gonna do but I was pretty 200% certain it wasn't going to be an easy answered prayer. I was right (for once haha) and it hurts. But I'm growing. And I'm glad I asked to know Him. I'm glad I have close friends to cry on and to love and to share with. I'm glad I know Him the tiniest bit more. I'm growing...heck I'm GROWING...how freaking awesome is it that God is growing me...of all people...me. Let's grow together. Let's grow the BCM. Easy is boring. Easy is really nice some times aka all the time but easy is boring. Let's grow and take the hard route and have bitter thoughts and hate people sometimes and not ever want to talk to God again...but then feel that wonderful downfall till trust in God is necessary so you don't go insane. Let's feel it. Let's grow the BCM together. Why are we so content with what we've already done. Let's fail a million times before we succeed together. Let's fall together. God's waiting for us to sign His yearbook...with more than just a "H.A.G.S"...why aren't we willing?

Frustration within Growth

2008-12-23T00:56:00.002-05:00

I think i've found that breaks are the hardest times for me to be happy and to be close with God. Somehow, though, this break I have been more consistent with my quiet times than i could ever have imagined and it feels amazing. It has sorta got me wondering though, why now? Why this Christmas am I suddenly feeling closer than ever to God and finally feeling like I can get to know Him like a long friend, keep building history with Him. I think I've finally broken down and been forced to trust Him and rely on Him more than ever. Going so many places over break and feeling Atlanta homesickness has left me closer to God simply by making me more alone and vulnerable. But with this great closeness to God, I keep wondering what I'm doing about it. I have missed so many chances to bring up God to my family...or to at least talk to them about things that are so important to me without feeling embarrassed or ashamed. I'm ashamed to be ashamed of God haha - I hate this in myself...why can't I be proud to want to go to christmas eve service even though my family doesn't want me to go...why can't I just be openly strong in my faith and not only live my faith but be willing to be vocal about my faith too...where do i draw the line between being obnoxiously vocal about God and being too ashamed to even mention Him...or worse to even avoid conversations about Him...I'm tired of being so afraid of discomfort...nothing will always be easy and comfortable - why would I expect God to be comfortable. I don't know where everyone else is this break with their families, but I feel like we all bring out the worst in each other. How can we build a family of unconditional love out of a family of separation and bitterness and past loss of trust. I want to be close to my family and want to see them...I want to share God, the most important thing/person/being/whatever you want to call Him, in my life with the people who i'm supposed to be the closest to. How do I share everything I've learned from God this past year and a half without making my family angry with me or without being ridiculed or made to feel stupid and young and innocent. I want to build up my family, but I want more for them to know God. How do I change this wanting into action? How do I live what I believe? How do I show them what I believe without pushing them away? If I'm the only one going through this or who can relate to this then I'm sorry for wasting your time...I hope everyone is having a safe and relaxing break. Merry Christmas of course.

2008-11-29T15:59:00.002-05:00

GO JACKETS!!!

**Great job to everyone who worked the cookouts and thank you to those who supported the cookouts this year!!!**

Way to finish out a season!!!

Will I serve God for nothing?

2008-11-23T15:53:00.003-05:00

so lately i've been struggling a lot with having a lot of questions and very few answers...i guess really that isn't a horrible thing it's just really hard for me to accept that fact that i won't always get a definite answer to my questions...anyway one particular one i've been struggling with has been how to switch from trying to follow God's will for my own benefit to trying to follow God's will simply to glorify Him. I feel like everything I do is centered around whether or not i'm comfortable or i'm happy. Even college...i'm so worried about what major i should be - what job i'll get when i graduate - but really why should it matter. Do i really believe that God can't use me no matter what job I have? of course not...then why do i worry about it so much. It's not that I'm worried that i won't be glorifying God...it's that i'm worried that i won't enjoy glorifying God or doing God's will won't be easy or painless. Pretty much all this worry is focused on me and my life and my goals and my happiness. At The Midtown Bridge Today, Larry spoke about Job. He brought up two big questions something around the lines of: Will a man serve God for nothing (if he loses everything)? and Is God still worthy to be served if you lose everything? I think those are incredibly important questions because honestly I don't think I could do what Job did. The littlest bumps in the road cause me to doubt God and wonder where He's gone and why He's not fixing the problem. One huge verse for me was Job 2:10 "Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" I don't know a lot of times I think I yearn to know God really well...to really really know him as a friend and father - to know Him in a way I could never know friends I see every day. But then I think about it, and I think that it's going to hurt a lot if i want to really know Him. It's just like any relationship...I can't expect to know someone incredibly well and really get them without working at the relationship and going through struggles and ups and downs....why do i expect a relationship with God to be any different...I want to "dig in and know the heart and integrity of God" I want to serve him for nothing... or at least I want to want those things...what do you want?

Tide-To-Go-Pen

2008-11-06T14:47:00.003-05:00

A crude joke here. A spot of bitterness there. A fresh blob of jealousy. I make a thorough mess of my life. My point is, I need the equivalent of a Tide-to-go-Pen for my life. All the little things that I choose to do that are instantly regretted upon the passing of that moment seem to be showing. I need something that removes the stains so that I can be on my way looking clean and hiding the mistakes I have made. Apologize. Laugh it off. Try to forget it. Be on my way.

This summer I worked camp. One week in a city off the coast of Mississippi, we attended the churches children's service. I was asked to do a demonstration of how bleach (Jesus) when added to Koolaid (sin) removes the color. I did the demonstration and made my point that Jesus takes all of our sins away like they were never there. Really? Like they were never there?

It is hard to let go. No one really can let go of everything however hard we like to think we can. Jesus took the punishment of ALL our sins. Past, present, future. However, He does leave us with a story. This story is the memory of all the stains. This story is what witnessing is all about. The cup that overfloweth. The forrest fire. The abundant love that we just can't contain. (Insert other Christianese metaphors.) Jesus came in because you let Him in. Jesus is the difference in you and your choices. Jesus is the reason you have a story to share. Sharing with anyone about how your story changed upon letting Jesus in is your witness.

The Truth is that all the big stains that you try to hide and the small blemishes that you ignore on your favorite shirt, however unpleasing to your eyes, are what give you a witness. A story. Share it.

What are you going through?

2008-11-02T18:14:00.002-05:00

Have you been having trouble trusting God? When you pray do you really believe that what you ask for God will deliver? Do you truly turn to God for every one of your problems, not just the ones that are convenient for you? Why ... but no, really,...why do you pray? Who are you sharing God with today? What questions are you asking?

What is everyone going through right now? Post - Share - Discuss

uninspired and nothing new - interested yet?

2008-10-20T11:28:00.003-04:00

So I've been thinking about what I should write about the Birmingham trip from fall break and to be completely honest I have been incredibly uninspired - not because the trip was uninspiring...quite the opposite actually...just because I feel like a lot of times everything's been said or that I am discovering things that everyone else has discovered many times before or that everyone has mastered a long time ago and I feel like that's my main issue lately. I focus on "mastering" parts of my life and checking them off of my check-list-o-life and then feel so accomplished and wonderful with myself. Maybe that's been my fatal mistake with my relationship with God lately. All I want to do is look at all of my flaws, recognize them, fix them, check them off, and move on. I want everything in my life - I want to be successful in school, a pro guitarist and worship leader, a genius yet also a creative thinker, and most of all I want to be liked by everyone. Maybe that's the issue - all this wanting. When we went to church on Sunday to David Platt's church I was incredibly bitter with life for no reason besides immaturity and selfishness and I was contemplating just leaving the service to go sit by myself for awhile and dwell in my poor poor life and how horrible everything was for me. But luckily I stayed because now looking back, David Platt's message was vital to getting me thinking on the right path that weekend. He spoke about giving up everything you have for God and how so many of us aren't willing to do that. I thought about that and my typical stupid self immediately decided that maybe I should stop buying things for myself and stop purchasing anything at all that makes me happy and to try to live a life completely for other people -and that's great in one way and giving up things money can be exactly what I'm supposed to do...but if my life ends up completely void of all satisfactiong, then I think that's exactly where I'm missing the point. One of Platt's main points was that "Jesus does not want to strip us of our pleasure; He wants to satisfy us with His treasure" and at the time I did not understand that one bit. I couldn't understand how me giving up everything that I have and everything that I love and enjoy could not be considered stripping me of my pleasure...I understood that in the end I will get a treasure far greater than anything I could ever hope for here on earth in the stupid ups and downs of life, but that still didn't change the fact that I was depriving myself or stripping myself of pleasure here right now in this moment. I can't say I totally get it now either but at least I feel like I have a better grasp on the situtation. Maybe this isn't what Platt meant and maybe this is actually the wrong way to look at things but I feel like maybe it's really an issue of what brings me pleasure - changing what I live for and changing where I draw my excitement and happiness from. I can still live with amazing joy and sense of accomplishment if I shift my focus on discipleship and really putting everything I have into other people and finding joy in their successes and accomplishments. In theory I love this idea, but I feel like for me it is not practical. I am human, therefore I am definitely not in any way, shape, form, universe, or way of thinking perfect. Therefore, especially for me personally, it is impossible for me to pour my entire self into other people without "snapping" eventually and becoming totally bitter towards the world for not returning all that my wonderful self-sacrificing, and entirely prideful self has given the world. I mentioned this when we were all at a park late at night the last day of the trip and it was great to just really think about how hard it is for us to pour ourselves into other people...how hard it is to be "glad and rejoice" even when we "are being poured out like a drink offering..." (haha I guess memorizing Philippians 2:1-18 at camp actually was useful...as much as I'm hesitant to admit it) But that's where God comes in and that's also where my answers stop and where I start to accept that "Our lack of knowing is the beginning of humility and the very essence of the spiritual life" (Messy Spirituality maybe? haha). Anyway I'm not sure if any of this is new, but if nothing else I feel like I have a little bit of a new outlook on life...I want to help other people and really truly not expect anything in return...and not hold grudges...and not think about what's best for me...but to sacrifice all of my relational and emotional and mental comforts for other people...and I know from 19 years of experience that I CAN NOT do that on my own...and the only way that will even sort of happen is if I continue to let God back into my life and completely believe He will do it...cause He will...in His own way...*awkward pause* *awkward face I always make at the ends of videos*

Caption Contest!

2008-10-02T13:29:00.002-04:00

All in good fun, because we all love our Campus Minister Mike...

Post a comment for a funny caption for this picture... The best gets a cookie. :)

Have a great day!

-Adrianne

DISCIPLESHIP...NOW!!

2008-10-02T09:58:00.004-04:00

Discipleship now...I really have no concept of what a d-now really is haha, but it has the word discipleship in it and therefore it's relevant right? I don't know, I just like the name. When I hear it I think of some old teacher staring at me with her face all scrunched up in frustration, arms waving through the air and eyes lasering a hole right through my heart screaming "DISCIPLESHIP....NOW!!!" Sometimes I wonder if that's the closest human approximation of what God feels when we don't follow his commands. Like he's sitting there making it so incredibly obvious what we can do to glorify Him in our individual lives, and yet we are just sitting there zoned out thinking "When's lunch?" or "I wonder if lasering is really even a word?" or "Why the heck is this even relevant?" If I can't even handle the frustration I feel with myself over all this, then how must God feel? I know that I can't really make these judgements on how God "feels" haha but I guess when I do make these kinds of judgements it helps me realize how stupid I'm being. Last Connector was all about discipleship and here I am halfway through it finding myself completely zoned out and not having any idea what I'm supposed to be getting out of it. Why can't I focus for even 10 minutes on something as important as God? I don't know, maybe I really am ADD and then I'd have a name to call it, but I really think I'm just not focused enough on what I need to be focused on. That's why writing things down is so important for me, and also why the sheet of paper that Cyndi handed out last Connector helped me collect my thoughts so much. It may seem trivial to receive a piece of paper with "I am becoming a disciple...I make disciples...in the way of Jesus" on it, but to me it was incredibly important. Cyndi talking about different people who just seem to know everything about everything and people who just know everyone really made me think about what kind of person I am. How am I becoming a disciple? How am I making disciples? And how am I doing this in the way of Jesus? I'm not sure if I have any definite answers yet, but I do feel like I've been resistant to becoming a disciple of the right people or right things lately. I almost would say I'm trying to be a disciple of myself lately and I'm really not OK with that. I say that I want to make disciples, even if that means putting myself out on a chopping block and risking my own security, but do I actually act like that? Sure, I work hard to increase my ring of friendship for my own benefit, but when do I even consider what God wants me to do? (He wants me to know haha...He's yelling it my direction) And why do I make it about my so called "ring of friendship" instead of recognizing the amazingly meaningful relationships I could be building? I don't know it just made me think on a tangent and so I thought maybe someone else might be thinking similar things. It's so easy to feel like we're the only ones going through things, even when we're hit over the head multiple times with examples of why we're not. If anyone took the time to read my randomness I'd love to hear opinions or just random thoughts or even completely irrelevant information. :-)

Confluence, again

2008-09-23T23:20:00.003-04:00

So just now I heard Malisa tell me that on facebook they have an add to "make the perfect man...why search for mr. right when you can make him right now!"...that's ridiculously scary haha. Somehow though I think it's really apropriate with what hit me real hard about confluence this past weekend and connector tonight. Lately I've been living a me-based life and hating every minute of it. Here's a prime example of how I've been acting. In a way, I've told myself that no one fits the mold I feel they should fit so therefore no one gets me and no one is realiable and no one is how I wanted them created so I should just give up on them and deal soley with me. I pushed everyone out of my life (especially God) and the sad part is that I didn't even realize it. David Platt mentioned this weekend how sometimes we keep God at a distance but yet expect Him to give us all the blessings and comfort that come with a relationship with Him. RELATIONSHIP...I feel like I've drifted from that with God and Confluence allowed me to recognize that real quick. A lot of what David Hartley posted below really goes along with my experience from the weekend. When worship started the first day I was bitter and incapable of giving God the praise he deserved. I actually spent a whole song just staring at the floor thinking there is no way I can get back on my feet and let people back in my life without letting God back in, yet I can't do that either. I can't even worship or for goodness sake even pretend to worship Him at this point. Then David Platt spoke and he talked about our self-sufficient society and I was like woahhhh, God is crazy awesome. This is literally the exact thing that I have been hardcore struggling with for the past few weeks and even though to be honest I wasn't really that pumped for confluence either, I am SO incredibly glad I went. I can't say I have changed drastically and I will never again return to my prideful self and pretend like I can handle it all alone, but I feel like a new person now at least...a new person with a new outlook on how much I need God and how little He needs me...errr I should really say how He doesn't need me at all. I don't know...it hit hard...and connector just added to the point for me this week. Get out - be a friend - love - spread it. David Platt mentioned how that is God's plan for our life...and now here's Mike up front in connector talking about how we need to push out of our shells and comfortable apartments, dorms, whatever and just care about other people, no matter their background. Before I became a christian the only reason I understood evangelism at all is because I figured that these people truly believe that Christ has saved them and drastically changed their lives for the better and therefore they care about me enough to want to share in that with me. I figured that if they truly believed that and wasn't sharing Christ with me, then they didnt really care about me or didn't truly believe. Now I'm convicted by that all the time. Usually I just brush it off, but hopefully this past weekend and tonight's confluence will pop me out of my shell and get me to be brave and talk to people like I need to - like we all need to. God has put people in my life that I need to talk to and love on. I see them and recognize them but I refuse God's plan for me. That's crap and I hope I learn not to accept that and to strive for more. I hope everyone at the BCM feels the same way. Despite all of the crap we throw at God and all the stuff we keep Him out of, God really wants to use us. Let's make it happen.

Confluence

2008-09-21T21:19:00.005-04:00

Wow, what a weekend. I think this is going to be a long post.

I have to admit, when I first signed up for Confluence I wasn't expecting anything spectacular. A conference in McDonough, GA on the same weekend as both GT Six Flags Night and a home football game didn't sound that much fun. It didn't help that I haven't missed a home football game since freshman year.

But still, to Confluence I went. It wasn't in Jekyll Island anymore and it wasn't called Fall Conference. I'm still not sure if the name change really means all that much in the long run. I think a big fancy name like Confluence might just sell short what really happened this weekend. If I had a chance to rename it, I might pick something like Long-Needed-Punch-In-The-Face-Fluence - you know, something clever like that. I'm sure we could pack the house with a name that catchy.

Our car was one of the last to arrive and we missed the (apparently) delicious BBQ served earlier. Still, we pulled up to this giant church parking lot and there were a boatload of excited people waiting for us. We heard yells, screams, shouts, and some sort of horn as we made our way inside. Inside, we were assaulted with high fives and assorted candies by people I've never seen before in my life. I wasn't really feeling the atmosphere at this point but I went along with it.

Steve Fee was a pretty awesome worship leader the whole weekend. I had seen him before at North Point and Buckhead church and always thought he was very talented. I understand that worship is what we make it, but Fee seems to have a gift for getting the people to connect to the words in his songs. He also understands our tendencies to shy away from true expressive worship. He did his best to call us out of our shells and into an authentic worship experience built only by the movement of the spirit.

But what really amazed me this weekend was David Platt. Actually, let me rephrase that. What really amazed me this weekend was the Holy Spirit's work through David Platt. I knew we were going to be in for a crazy weekend right from the first message. This guy wasn't pulling any punches. One of his first statements is bold and unnerving: God doesn't need us. He called us out immediately, asking if we could really claim a complete dependence on the Holy Spirit. Do I have a desperation for the Spirit of God? Woa - these were some hard questions.

Why must we be desperate for His presence? Here were David Platt's four main points:
1. We have an assignment we cannot fulfill.
2. We have a priviledge we cannot forsake
3. We have a family we cannot forget
4. We have a God that we cannot fathom.

This was a little shellshocking. It made me realize how easy it is to go on planning events, and living a religous life utterly devoid of the Holy Spirit. It left me feeling more than a little uneasy.

That night we checked into our hotel (the Microtel! Woo!) and headed off in large mass to the Waffle House within walking distance. We crowded into the booths there and shared in laughter and food.

Fast forward to the next morning as we shuffled out of our hotel, into cars, and finally into rows at the church. Steve Fee once again leads us in some awesome worship and David Platt walks slowly on to the stage. He spends some time talking about God's will and how not to do it. Here's some of what I wrote down on how NOT to find God's will:
- Not coincidences
- Not by picking random spots in the Bible
- Not by simply walking through open doors
- Not by avoiding closed doors
- Not the still small voice method

So how do we discern God's will? Platt tells us to turn to Matthew 28:16-20. This is the great commission. Uh-oh. This was another tough message to hear. Turns out God's will for our lives was written there in red letters at the end of Matthew. Platt continues to ask us tough questions about how we are fulfilling this great commandment in our own lives.

After the message we had a fine afternoon of relaxation. Most everyone went to Mellow Mushroom while a small group including myself ate at Zaxby's. I even managed to get in a nap afterwards, something I really needed.

Fast forward again to that night. Steve Fee once again seems to "get" authentic worship. But he's not the one I want to hear from at the moment. I'm waiting to hear from David Platt, to hear what his final points, to get to the bottom of this uneasiness in my heart.

Finally the time comes. Steadily, slowly Platt walks out onto the stage. He asks us to turn to Luke 9:57-62.

This is not an easy passage to teach. It talks about hard things that are difficult to understand. Give it a read and you'll see what I mean. Platt poses three questions based on this passage:

1. Will we choose comfort or will we choose the cross?
2. Will we settle for maintenance or will we sacrifice for mission?
3. Will our generation be marked by indecisive minds or undivided hearts?

Comfort vs. Cross. Maintenance vs. sacrifice. Indecisive minds vs. Undivided hearts. This is it: this is key. Christ is calling us to sacrifice all. Not some, not half, not most, all. I was filled with confusion over this: What can this possibly look like in my own life? Does this mean drop out of school? Move to Africa? Sell everything I have? The thoughts that rushed through my head were very confusing.

As we talked about the weekend later that night amongst our own group I realized that God had been saying many different things to us all. For some, they realized that they been convicted over playing a pretend religious life on the outside while the inside was turmoil. For others, I heard struggle over what to do with their lives when graduation came. Still others questioned what it meant to sacrifice it all and still had no answers.

I still don't have all the answers, but I figured out one thing God was saying to me.

I have a confession to make: I'm addicted to approval. I can't think of a better way to say it. The decisions I make on a day to day basis are largely motivated by my own selfish desire for others to approve of my actions. This means that, for the most part, I have worked my way into situations without the presence of the Holy Spirit as a guide. This realization both disturbs me and frees me. Though its not something I am happy about, knowing the source of this uneasiness I have felt on my heart frees me to give it up to Christ. Theres a reason I was able to leave McDonough with joy in my heart: Christ died for this sin too.

There's still more to be said about everything God has spoken about this weekend, yet, I cannot speak for all. I have seen the presence of the Holy Spirit working in people's hearts this weekend and it is a beautiful thing. I cannot wait to see where God is taking this thing from here.

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If you've got a story that you want to share about Confluence this weekend, feel free to leave a comment or send one of us an e-mail. You are welcome to keep anything you want to be posted here anonymous.

P.S. If you didn't make it to Confluence, you should check out Platt's sermons available here. Particularly check out 9/7/08 "What the Gospel demands." Its pretty close to what Platt was saying over the weekend.

Worship

2008-09-17T16:17:00.002-04:00

Last night's Connector was all about Worship. One of the passages that Cyndi spoke about was from Nehemiah. When Ezra the scribe opened the Bible, an entire crowd rose to their feet. Then they all bowed to the ground to worship God. We're talking thousands of people. Wow.

For me, it was nice to get a reminder that worship isn't all about a band and some singing. Instead, worship can be done in so many ways... in fact, worship is a 24-7 act in response to God. We should worship God with every step we take during the day, in our interactions with others, in how we handle situations. Basically every single thing we do should be for God's glory.

It's hard to be that way, though. I often find myself making everything about me and my needs, and I become blind to the perils of those around me. I become selfish.

My prayer for myself and all of us is that we make our lives become a constant act of worship to God. I hope that we will know that God is present and desire to do nothing but glorify Him.

9/16/08 Connector

2008-09-17T02:15:00.002-04:00

Hey everybody!

Sorry for the late post, but I've been busy doing some homework (as Georgia Tech students are occasionally found to do) until just now. Tonight we had the first Connector since this blog thing got started (as far as I'm aware), as well as the last Connector before Confluence (this weekend!).

Quite a number of individuals contributed to this week's Connector service, and it showed. We had great mini-speakers (that's what I'm calling 'em) in Brandon Cullum and Mike Whelan (as per usual), followed by a brief activity/game and a quality video from Will Marshall, Lindsay McCurdy, and Malisa Thompson. (Sorry about the parentheses and all the first/last name combos. It's just my thing.) After that we had some great leadership in Cyndi Forman with some moving speech (and tying in a good bit of scripture). To wrap it up, we had Charlie Hunter, Caitlin Collins, Andrew Harvard, Jonathan Barth, Oliver Albrecht, and Chris Mize (that's everybody, right?) lead us in 5 great worship songs in a top-notch performance that deserves everyone's congratulations. (Seriously! 5 songs in a row after a regular school day and an earlier practice? That takes some major stamina!)

From my perspective, as someone involved in the production of Connector this week (I handled the computer/projector display), I think things went great. If you'll allow me to geek out for a little bit, I'll elaborate. :) Instead of the usual Live Worship application we normally use for presenting the lyrics and announcements, Mark Lamb lent me the use of his MacBook Pro with Pro Presenter on it. After a really brief crash course, I got to use it for my first time while gearing up for Connector to start and was in a mad dash to get things ready in time. Especially the lyrics! I'm sorry for messing up a few times here and there, but I think I managed ok and I promise improvement next time it's my turn. I hope things went well enough from your perspective!

Finally, and slightly unrelated, this weekend is Confluence! This is the BCM's Fall conference, and should be great. It's not too late to sign up, so go by the BCM office ASAP and hand in your $82 if you want a spot.

I guess that's it for me tonight, everybody. I hope everyone who goes to Fall conference enjoys the weekend. For those of us not going, have a safe and blessed weekend, whether you're going to GT Night @ Six Flags, the Mississippi State game, both, neither, or anything else!

Peace,
Michael

Coming Aboard

2008-09-12T01:18:00.001-04:00

Hey everyone!

For my first post on here I just wanted to say I'm glad to be a part of this and I'm hoping to have fun. In the future, I'll try to keep posts far more relevant and important. (Well, as important as anything I have to say ever can be anyways. :P )

Peace!

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First Attempt at Scrapbooking

2008-09-07T18:34:00.001-04:00

So this is one of the things that inspired this blog... a way to make scrapbook pages freely available to anyone who wants to see them. (Not to mention that this is cheaper and easier.) So enjoy!

To view it full screen, click on the icon at the bottom right!

Look for more to come soon!

Welcome!

2008-09-07T17:41:00.000-04:00

Welcome one and all to the first post of the new Georgia Tech BCM blog. I hope that we can use this to encourage one another and let everyone know what's going on here at the BCM!

-Adrianne